backpack ready to order

design, orderable

I got pictures yesterday from the last photoshoot we did. I like this photo especially, I like how much movement it has, Judit, the photographer and Hanna, the model made an awesome job! I made this backpack somewhere in the last years of university. I was feeling quite lost at that time, so I thought at least I’m making a backpack. Hope you like it!
I am using it right now, I really like wearing, using things that I made myself, so hopefully you can have that feeling also if I personalize your order to your own taste.

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here you can find more information about the backpack: backpack information
and here you can order one: backpack order

unexpected challenges

thoughts

I had a very unexpected difficulity/challenge while visiting Montenegro. The first time when I was at a place that was unusual, interesting or beautiful for me I recoiled.

I was thinking: how can I take in all I see, hear and feel at this place? What is the essence of this place, why it is beautiful, how is it beautiful, what does it mean to me, how does it make me feel?

My best answer for this right now is time. When I’m at a beautiful natural place for example for just ten minutes somehow I feel so distant from that place, it’s like I’m looking at a photo or watching a documentary. I don’t feel anything. But when I spend more time, couple of hours or more if I have the opportunity I’m slowly starting to connect with the place. The sounds are slowly starting to reach me. I feel, see and sense everything that’s around me. And I become a part of it.

traveling plans

what's up with me

In two weeks I’m going to be in Podgorica, Montenegro, yay! I’m going to be couchsurfing, my host is a musician, I hope I can learn something while I’m there.

I don’t know what I will do there exactly, but I guess the same as here, freelance, enjoy my days, meet people, walk around in the city, enjoy the nightlife, food and I’m interested in visiting the National Parks of Montenegro. Hope I don’t get lost or get in some kind of trouble. First trip as a freelancer!

While I was thinking about this trip and about traveling in general I came across videos about Chiang Mai and how it is the freelancer/digital nomad heaven. Since then I kind of want to move there. So my plan is, first go for half a year, see how I like it and if I really feel that I belong there, move there.
I think it’s a good place for me, I can imagine staying there and maybe start a digital nomad family.

And I found out that Budapest is one the best places for freelancing according to Nomad List, which is pretty accurate. 😀 It’s at 3rd place right now. Wow, and I just live here already, how cool is that?

thoughts on stochastic creation

art, design, thoughts

Something came into my mind since I wrote my last post about trying to understand beauty. If beauty is the number of good choices made in order to create an object, why are randomly, stochasticly created things beautiful? For example paint randomly poured to a canvas or treeleaves fallen to the ground in a random order?

Is this stohastic process actually made out of many unintentional choices determined by the laws of physics? Are these radomly created objects the result of many choices the same way as an intentionally designed object is, only difference is that not we are who are making them.

how I started to love my body

thoughts

This is how I found my way to love my body, I hope it can help to those who are also on their journey finding beauty in themselves.

There were a lot of things that were needed to make me able to feel really good in my body. First, I think I needed to reach a certain age, self-acceptance takes time.
I think for me it was also important to experience a healthy, positive relationship with someone. Experiencing what it feels like to love someone else’s body and someone else loving your body set me up on the journey of accepting myself.

The biggest change happened in the last few years when I started to live on my own and spend time by myself. For the first time in my life I was on my own, I wasn’t somebody’s daughter, sister, friend or girlfriend. It was just me. And for the first time in my life I saw myself as I am and not as a comparison to something or someone.

I saw what actually was there, a body with joyful eyes, full lips, yes, gigantic feet, a weirdly nice-looking nose, natural, wavy smooth hair, long arms and legs, curvy hips and belly, uneven ears, and so many other things. Just a body where it feels good to be in and experiencing life is fun. It’s beautiful because it is a living thing just like any other living thing, not because it looks or doesn’t look a certain way. It is beautiful and amazing because it makes me able to draw and sing and dance and listen to music and hug my friends and do everything I like to do.

getting emotionally attached to projects

design

When I get a project that I really like I always feel this way. After I accept the project I start thinking about it and it stays with me the whole time and it effects every minute of my life in that time period.

So when I’m at the finishing stages I can’t help but feel a little sad as if I’m saying goodbye to a good friend. I’m starting to miss everything that happened in that time period, everything I’ve learned, people I got to know, hardship and success.

It’s not so easy to find projects like this, where everything is really good, good client, good purpose, interesting topic and also it’s something that fits my abilities. When I do, it’s really memorable for me, I think I had four of these so far. I feel so thankful for them, I hope I keep finding projects like those.

This is what I’m working on right now. It will be a unique prosthesis with an Apple watch embeded in it. What I really like about this project is that it is very experimental and open for innovation. Also I found out during this project that I’m really interested in designing unique prosteses. I like designing personal objects, and what could be more personal than an artificial body part? I think that someone who wears a prosthesis should be able to make it their own and make it personal.

The other strange feeling after finishing a project is confusement. Where to go further after this? Should I find a project that is more interesting or more purposeful? More challanging or pays better? After a while it is not so unambigous what progress means.

I am totally going to buy a bra from the money I’ve made out of freelancing

design, thoughts

It is an amazing feeling when you are able to make money out of something you love and believe in. To me this is designing, I don’t know exactly why, but this is what I want to do. I enjoy creating things and making decisions about an object. And every decision I make will factor into the end result. I really like this process. And I like it how I learn from every decision I make.